Chapter 5. SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, WONDERFUL SPAM

[thebestseller]

I TASTE LIKE SPAM TODAY.

WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THIS PLACE?

Comments

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

WHY ARE YOU TASTING YOURSELF IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Oh spam. Man that makes me kinda hungry. Do we have real spam here?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

I was curious! Nothing wrong with wanting to know what I taste like!

I'm sure there was some at the buffet, but the place is gone now.

Also, there appear to be unicorns about again. Just saying.

[1/2]

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

HA! Nice try, word-man! I know for a fact that there's no unicorn in my bedroom right now! You're just trying to make me freak out! WELL IT'S NOT WORKING!

I'm gonna go make a sandwich, Mr. Spam.

[2/3] I lied

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

[If Derrick is home he can hear the bedroom door opening.

Wait for it...


WAIT FOR IT!]

[3/3] THERE!

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

FML

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Hmm, I wonder if the unicorn has a flavor, too? Perhaps it tastes like sunshine and rainbows?

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

DON'T YOU DARE LICK MY UNICORN!

It might get ideas!

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Hey, I never planned on going near the thing. It's embarrassing you enough by its presence, after all.

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

We've been over this! There is no scientific way of proving a male is a...you know..or not!

Besides I don't think you can get close to it, can you? Won't it faint or die or something?

...Because you are evil. Not because you're not a ... you know.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Oh, please. I'm so innocent. I have a halo and everything. Unicorns just LOVE ME, doncha know.

[man-genius.livejournal.com]

And yet you don't have one.

[feathered-earth.livejournal.com]

Good question, but it c

Spam?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Spam. Processed ham in a can.

[feathered-earth.livejournal.com]

Doesn't sound familiar... does it taste nice?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Tends to be one of those things you either love, hate, or don't care about either way. I don't mind it, but I won't go out of my way to eat it.

chatty Cara is chatty

[feathered-earth.livejournal.com]

Hm. Well if it's like last time, it'll only last the day... then again maybe I shouldn't jinx it by thinking that.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Or maybe this time we'll change flavours every few hours.

[feathered-earth.livejournal.com]

Maybe. I haven't noticed anything different since I woke up though.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Bummer. That would have been incredibly entertaining.

[sassyandpink.livejournal.com]

Ew. You know spam is gross, right?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

I'm sure SOMETHING tastes worse. Can't think of much, though.

[sassyandpink.livejournal.com]

Sure, a lot of things taste worse, but spam doesn't just taste bad, it's really bad for you too.

[Pen taps.]

But I guess as long as you're not actually eating it, you should be fine.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

I'd have to be eating myself for that to happen, which is a liiiiittle weird.

[sassyandpink.livejournal.com]

Yeaaah, that would be really weird. Don't eat yourself, okay?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Promise.

[sassyandpink.livejournal.com]

Great. ♥

Spam in my lunchbox at work~ *shot for singing that*

[esoteric_rose.livejournal.com]

What is spam?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Spam is processed ham that comes in a can. Bit of an acquired taste. You could probably find some in the Bazaar if you're curious.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

What's spam?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Ham in a can. It's oddly pink.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Well that's a strange place to put ham. Sounds kinda gross

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

It's an acquired taste. My man-twin loves it, of course.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

No doubt. Who's your twin?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Genius. Charger wanted to call him Vicky Complex when we were born.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Genius, huh. Well nothin' wrong with nicknames, yanno.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Mmm. Except Genius went crazy when he suggested it. My man-twin is more than a little neurotic.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Mn some people are so touchy 'bout nicknames.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Dunno why. Charger wanted to call ME Narky Complex. Would make a dandy pen name.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

This Charger sounds like an interestin' guy.

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

Interesting is one way of putting it. Doesn't seem to like his job greeting people very much...

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Can't he just quit his job?

[bloody-pens.livejournal.com]

That WOULD make sense.

[redhead-rabbit.livejournal.com]

Ya'd think so, right? Must have some reason he keeps doin' it, yanno?